Wednesday, January 2, 2013

By the Emporer's Butthole!

Big, long, high pointed, inflated loving, epic, baby got back, FAT ASS hobby!  This hobby is a monster since I first jumped back into Warhammer 40k and Fantasy. So tell me, dear reader, what the frack happened to me? What a minute, did I just say "FRACK"?

So the little story goes like this, an friend Tony call me out when he heard I used to play Warhammer 40K and fantasy. I had to represent (Who? I dunno but just go with me on this). I dig out my old battalion box of Bretonnians I've never finished. I need to buy more stuff make an actual army to play him. I buy big red book.  Holy crap.  I see price on big red book. Holy shit.

I buy army book. OK, WTF? I buy a few boxes of stuff to build army trying to ignore price. Holy crap shit WTF Emperor's Butthole! This was not the GW I remembered.

Back then when I played Tony I considered that a huge arrmy.  I had to re-adjust to how GW was now to what I remembered it then in my high school/college days.  I remember saying to myself, "Wow, this is all I'll ever need to do the Wargaming thing".  It was freaking expensive but it's ok, it's all I need.

Yeh... right!

Just like my scale modeling hobby, I went into this hobby full bore. At first the thought was that I'd get just going to get enough to play him that one game.  Then I decided it was fun, as expensive as it is, I can afford it.  So I expanded my Brets a little bit more.

The problem was I couldn't (at first) find any fantasy players around my area (Tony was an hour and a half away depending on traffic).  So I decided to get into 40k again and go space wolves as some of you may know if you've been following me from my jump over from the scale modeling channel to the wargaming channel.

40k was just as worse as Fantasy; more figures, more books, more everything and of course, more money. This is what I call the "Emporer's Butthole Effect". You get addicted to either games, then you realized, the best games to play in Warhammer are the bigger ones.  So you have to get more figures and build a bigger army. Then as you play more and get more experience, you realized you have to get extra stuff so you can adjust your list to handle certain army make ups.

Then when you think you're done, a new edition is released or a codex (either for your army or an opponent you play) gets released and it changes the balance of the game where you have to change up your army.  So you have to buy new models or to get more specialized units... etc.

The Emporer's Butthole. Now why do I keep saying that? Because after buying stuff to play whatever you need to play you'll feel like the Emperor's Butthole after good ol' boy Horus had his way with it with his big sexy power sword.

But it doesn't stop there, at least not for me.  I wanted to start other armies I played against, not just because the fluff is awesome but to learn what they can do. So it builds and builds and you hit that line.  That's the line when the boxes stack more then what you can take on.  But it's ok, you find deals, you trade, you WANT more to play EPIC games.

We're just not talking GW. It spilled to other games like WarmaHordes, Malifaux, Infinity and newer games like Relics and Drop Zone Commander.  They all can have the same Emporer's Butthole effect.  Depending on the system, most of them isn't as expensive as GW but the effect is still there.  Malifaux has been my addicted game of late.

But playing just one game you can find yourself surrounded with stuff that you will get to later.

Here's the current affair for me.  At my work bench under my table are models put away from stuff I will get to. Armies that are ready to be painted:

I've got the shelf behind me full of stuff that hasn't even been opened. The plastic wrapper is still on the damn things:


Then you have the shelf full of figures of things you're trying out:

Then you got the stuff that's currently being worked on:


Now you're finding that you're running out of room so you have to extend where you're storing things.  so downstairs on a shelf I have tons more that needs to be done:

And does it matter that it's on a shelf? Even the figures I'm playing with in it's bags and Tupperware still need to be finished:

Even my damn cat is reading up on the latest Chaos Codex (that explains a few thing about the psycho kittay!):

So this hobby has become a monster for me but I'm loving every minute of it.  As much as GW IS expensive, I can't help but wanting to collect it whether it's because of the fluff or that I actually want to paint them.  And when you love something you love, you'll put your heart and time into it.

How about you dear readers?  How much has the Emporer's Butthole influenced you in this hobby?

3 comments:

  1. And I thought I had a collecting problem. :)

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  2. Yes He did indeed influence me. Bouncing from fantasy to 40k to new shiny armies. and forgeworld never helps the wallet.
    Peace

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  3. I stopped buying any new GW product in 2005. My Emporers Butthole problem was getting epic and threatening to cause permanent incontinence problems. I had 14 playable armies of 2k or more, and enough spares to assemble a few more(and thats not counting the armies that basically got invalidated like Eye of Terror codex armies). I have a spare bedroom that stores most of my miniatures and hobby stuff, as I long ago grew past being able to fit it all in anything but a cavernous closet.

    Warmachine & Hordes is what gets most of my attention these days, I like that Privateer Press treats us like customers they actually like- not inconvenient peasants whom they bless with thier stuff as GW does. WM/H is alot less repetitive in terms of painting and modeling. Anyone thats assembled more than 100 marines or guardsmen in a single day can likely relate to painting some beasts, and infantry(usually less than 20) being much less tedious.

    And Malifaux is slowly drawing me in as my room mate is actually interested in playing it too...

    It makes me feel old though- I have paint- that I bought myself- thats older than many of the newer gamers these days! (Ral Partha paint, purchased 22 years ago). So, I at least have the excuse that I've been gathering the various tools for a loooong time ;)

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